Last Friends: Fairytale
by sherwin
Summary: Last Friends ラスト・フレンズ . Ruka, do you remember the night you kissed me for the very first time? Michiru POV


**Last Friends: Fairytale**

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Ruka, do you remember the night you kissed me for the very first time? I can't help but wish to be able to go back to that time again, relive those fairytale-like days that seem so far away now.

The cold rain cleanses me, temporarily numbing me from the reality, as I hurry away from the scene of a bad dream. Even as my mind tries to convince me that, I can feel my body crying out its objection with each step I take, reminding me that it's broken. Just like how my heart is.

Ruka, I wonder what a true home is. Isn't it supposed to be a place where you feel happy, protected, and loved? Somewhere you can't wait to go back to after a hard day? That's what I remember feeling whenever you took me over to your house. Just when I thought I've found a place with all that, a place I could call my own home, the only thing I felt was terror and helplessness.

Without a home or even a house to return to, the only place my feet would carry me to is my little sanctuary at the park. Whatever problems I used to have at home or at school, it was one of very few places that managed to comfort me. Sitting here at my usual spot with the rain pelting me relentlessly, I remember a night not too different from tonight, four years ago. It was a stormy night too, probably a reflection of the torrential emotions that were running through me at the time.

...

Father had been drinking again that day. He always drank when he's had a bad day. I didn't understand then, why someone would drink something that bitter if it just made them more upset. Most of the time, mother would just quietly send me out the door and tell me to go play and not come home for a couple of hours. It had been like that since I was little, and it became more frequent after father got laid-off by his company when I was in high school. Even though mother talked and acted like nothing was wrong, I knew what he did to her during his 'bad' times. I saw the answers on her face and body each time I walked back through the door.

It troubled me back then. Why father did that kind of thing to mother. Why she let him. But now, I might just be able to understand a little. Human beings are weak creatures after all, struggling to live with irreconcilability. And I guess I am no different.

Perhaps, that was why I tended to find comfort in reading fictional stories. Usually finding myself heading to the library during the times I was not allowed to go home. You would go along with me even though you mentioned that reading wasn't exactly your idea of fun. Especially stories of the fairytale variation that you used to roll your eyes at. You just couldn't seem to understand my fascination with them, thinking them so unrealistically syrupy and wondering why I would want to read about somebody else's romance. The Ruka-ness of your reaction would always incite a fond smile from me while I'd just say that they seemed interesting.

But Ruka, it was also the only way I could escape the reality I was trapped in and pretend to be someone else. Living an exciting life through the characters, it allowed me to experience the feeling of being loved and forget about my own sad existence for a little while. I loved reading those stories where the prince on a white horse always saves the damsel in distress; they fall in love and live happily ever after. It gave me hope that one day, I would find my own prince charming and we would build our own "happily ever after". The girls at our class would snicker at how childish my thoughts were. You have always been different from those girls. Without making (too much) fun of me, you would encourage me with a nod or a smile. You were the only one I could really share my dreams and hopes with.

But, there was something I kept to myself then. I had hope that if my prince were out there somewhere, he would be someone like you, Ruka. It may sound weird, saying that, since Ruka is a girl and rides a blue mountain bike instead of a white horse, but that was my impression of Ruka at that time. A princely existence. You would always appear by my side whenever something was wrong. It could be about the most trivial of things, like the neighbor's cat dying, but you never failed to be there to listen and offer comforting words to cheer me up.

Even during particularly hard times, when I cried like a baby and ruined your favorite t-shirt -something I had to apologize to you often- you just shrugged it off like it was no big deal, and joked that now you'll have an excuse to buy more. No one has ever made me laugh through my tears like you did, Ruka. I can't remember how many times I was saved by your presence in my life, by our friendship.

That night when you found me here, was another one of those times.

…

"Ruka, do you think I'll be able to find happiness one day?" I turned my head and hesitantly asked after you took a seat beside me. The rain stopped, but I must have looked like a drowned rat to you. "Eh," you seemed surprised even though it was something that I'd asked you countless times before. "What kind of question is that? Of course you'll be happy!" And it never failed to cheer me up a little seeing you so convincingly giving the same answer each time.

I smiled sadly at you, knowing that it was just an attempt to cheer me up, but I was thankful for it nonetheless. Probably sensing that I was still not convinced, you brought up my favorite subject with a grin, "Hey, it'll be fine! You'll definitely find a great guy to be your prince charming and uh...he'll be swept off his feet, and you two will live in a big house with a garden full of beautiful flowers!"

That brought a genuine laugh out of me. "I'm the one that's supposed to be swept off my feet!" I pointed out your obvious error at quoting me. "Oh, well," you shrugged, "anyone would be swept off their feet when they see you, Michiru" you continued nonchalantly.

"Stop saying stuff like that when you know it's not true..." I looked down while trying to contain my smile and stop myself from blushing at the way you said it, like it was a fact. You laughed out loud at my reaction, "What are you getting modest for? If it's not true, then tell me what I've been doing at school all this time?" you asked incredulously.

"What are you talking about?" I pretended not to understand.

"Those persistent suitors of yours, I swear, the numbers are increasing by the day!" you clarified, still clearly amused that you have to play the role of my bodyguard in addition to best friend.

"Well...not like I can do anything about it..." I timidly replied, still not understanding what those guys see in me.

"Hmm, so none of them is prince material?" you asked lightly, but with a serious look on your face and something in your eyes that I couldn't decipher. I felt my heart skip a beat.

"Eh, prince...material?" Only one person came to mind at that question. I laughed nervously and looked away. I couldn't just say that the only one that has ever been close to being a prince was you. It would be too embarrassing...even if it was the truth. I could feel my face heating up again just from the thought of it.

"Oh. So, there is someone..." you said, misunderstanding my reaction. I could hear something like disappointment in your voice, but when I looked up again, only a big smile greeted me. "Heh, isn't that great? Who's the guy? Maybe I can set you two up. Michiru, you're seriously too shy. Nothing would happen if I don't help you!" you went on enthusiastically, not giving me a chance to explain.

"Ah, um...it's not..." I thought I'd just deny it all, but you probably wouldn't have believed me, seeing how flustered I was getting by the moment. "It's...It's you, Ruka." I blurted out, surprising you and myself with the sudden admission. I wonder why, the thought of you mistakenly thinking that I see someone else as a prince tugged at my heart.

Judging from the sudden silence, what I said probably made the misunderstanding worse. I worriedly looked down onto my own fidgeting fingers, not daring to look at you and your reaction. I thought you would probably laugh at me or think I was weird .

"I see..." you quietly replied, increasing my apprehension.

After a few seconds that seemed like a lifetime, I felt you shifting beside me. Getting curious, I hesitantly looked up and found your face just inches from mine. Before I could even think of pulling away, your hands were already gently resting by the side of my face, holding me still. They felt cool against my heated skin.

Wearing a look I'd never seen on you before, you started to close the remaining distance between us, "You wouldn't mind me doing this then..." you whispered, sending my heart racing. I probably looked like a deer caught in the headlights then. Your intent getting more obvious, you searched my eyes as if trying to gauge my reaction, stole a fleeting look at my lips, then looked back up again.

Even if I wanted to move away, I couldn't. The surreal-ness of the situation and the intensity of your gaze rendered me motionless. I had secretly imagined how my first kiss would be like, drawing up scenarios leading to it and wondering how I would feel. I certainly didn't expect it to happen this way! But I thought that if it was Ruka... With a jumble of emotions coursing through me, the only thing I could do was to shut my eyes at what was coming.

Suddenly, I felt them for the very first time; your lips. The kiss was soft, warm and filled with tenderness. Exactly how I imagined my perfect first kiss would feel like...had it been on my lips instead of my forehead. I felt an odd sense of both relief and disappointment. You lingered a while before pulling back and looking at me, a cheeky grin instantly replacing the split second conflicted look that I probably imagined. "What? You thought I was really gonna do it?" you asked with a laugh, before getting up and bounding away from the bench we were sitting.

I could feel my cheeks flaming with embarrassment. "Rukaaa!" I stood up and chased after you, feeling annoyed at what you had just put my heart through. "Seriously! Stop joking like that. You really worried me for a moment there!" You just seemed so serious. And the way you looked at me...

You turned around and faced me, a gentle smile on your face. "Well, don't princes always kiss their princesses when they're fast asleep, or something?" You pointed out, summarizing all fairytales with probably the only one that you'd ever read. "It's a bit low for something that I would do..." you said with a contemplating look. "But I guess since I'm your prince and all, I'll just have to wake you with a kiss the next time you fall asleep during our study sessions."

I don't know whether to take it seriously or not when you say things like that with a straight face. You really like making me blush don't you? "No, they don't! And the one always falling asleep is you!" I huffed sulkily, not bothering to correct you that what I had admitted was only you being prince material. Still, it warmed my heart, hearing you say that you were my prince, even if it was in jest. You chuckled again, "Stop pouting! I was just kidding, maybe..." Before I could say anything at that, you reached out and grasped my hand, "Come on, let's get you dry, you'll catch a cold like this! We're having sukiyaki today. Sukiyaki!" You said excitedly and pulled me along. It was like magic, the way you easily transformed my frown into a smile each time.

...

Ruka, one of the things I cherished most back then was being allowed to share the warmth of your family. Despite me dropping by so often, your parents would always welcome me with open arms and reserve a spot at the dinner table for me. I might have felt just a tiny bit envious sometimes, but I was truly glad that you had a wonderful and supportive family. It made me realize that not all families were like mine, and someday, if I was lucky enough, I might be able to have something like that too.

With my arms around your waist and the soft warmth of your back against my cheek, I hoped for the ride back to my house to never end. Because each time I returned to the coldness of that place, I would always wonder if those times with you and your family were just fantasy created by my desperate mind, just like those stories I read. It made me hold onto you tighter as you rounded the final bend to my house. As always, you probably sensed my uneasiness and reluctance as we wished each other good night. With a bright smile, you told me to look forward to the next day as you had something interesting to show me. Even though I didn't manage to get it out of you then, it piqued my interest enough to distract me from my previous gloomy thoughts. I think, that night was the first time in my young life that I had prayed so hard for something. Instead of wishing for a different life, for loving parents or a happier family like I usually did, I prayed that god would allow you to stay by my side forever.

...

But reality was crueler than expected. If I hadn't had to go away so suddenly that night, I wonder how the present would have been like for both of us. The kiss you gave me at this same spot, even if it wasn't what I'd expected, really made me happy. At that time, it was probably the closest to an expression of love I had ever felt before. The memories of you and our times together sustain me through my toughest hours, even now.

Ruka, am I allowed to feel that kind of pure and unbounded happiness again?

I reach for my cell phone, memories of times past warming my cold heart and giving me strength to reach out for the only prince that could save me now.

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A/N: And they live happily ever after... I wish I can say that but we'll see. Thanks a lot to Suketeru for the beta. Please click the review button below and feed me(anonymous reviews function is enabled). Good? Bad? Should I continue posting more of these? Or suggestions what you want me to write next...Takeru POV? Heheh, anything is fine. Lemme know. Thanks for your time.


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